Prioritizing Relationships

If how we spend our time and money shows us what and who we value, 

what do we see about ourselves when we look at our daily agendas and our personal expenses?

As I sat listening to President Julie Beck teach about the people in our lives, and our stewardships in certain relationships, an image began to form in my mind. I could circles, similar to a bullseye target, with my most highly prioritized relationships beginning in the middle and extending outward from there.

Prioritized Relationships
Hierarchy of Influence

She continued "A good woman knows that she does not have enough time, energy, or opportunity to take care of all of the people or do all of the worthy things her heart yearns to do... But with personal revelation, she can prioritize correctly and navigate this life confidently."

Being very familiar with this topic himself, Elder Maxwell sometimes spoke about preventing oneself from getting "people fatigue" as he called it, and even had this quote from one of my favorite authors hanging on the wall in his office.

I could not agree more. 

We believe in more than prioritized to do's but rather in prioritized to be's; We believe in more than solely prioritized responsibilities but prioritized relationships. That life, in the end, is not so much about what we did, but who we have become, and how we have influenced others around us in their development of becoming as well. 

Starting centrally, first in our hearts, then in our homes, extending to our homelands and beyond. The peace we seek is not solely that which is personal but it starts there and then extends to the people God has entrusted most closely to us - family and close friends. Surely, our influence will be most far reaching as we reach out best to those who are closest to us. Wouldn't the world be a better place if everyone was nurtured well by those close around them.

We live in a day of so much connectivity: Facebook, Twitter, email, phone calls, instant messaging, Instagram, etc,. The target helps me see clearly who it is most important for me to stay well connected with. Distinguishing the difference between prioritized people in my life has helped me feel peace about not being as accessible to others as I would like to be if I had all the time in the world, but I do not. Lately, I have been focusing on quality rather than quantity when it comes to relationships and people in my life. I have been "pruning" my life in a sense. I haven't wanted quantity as much as I have craved for a sense of "closeness."

My Fam
A Central Circle

With that, seeing my prioritized relationships has given me a guide in choosing what I do with my free/social time and who I do those things with. It has also helped me feel reassurance when opting out of just one more social event. Don't we all have plenty of things we could do with our time or places we could go? Our opportunities and options are more than our ability to do them all. We want more than to do's and agenda items, we want significance, enjoyment and we want those things with the people who know us well and who like us as we are.

Our challenge may be staying closely connected with the central circles while being connected to so many others. I cannot give myself to every out-of-the-blue message in my multiple inboxes. I cannot attend every social invitation available. Life has its limitations, and we cannot give in great measure to those in the outer circles and expect to have much of ourselves "left over" for the the inner circles, the priority people we love most and want to be best for.

So for this present pruning period and season of simplifying my life, here's to saying no to too many outer circle options. Here's to double checking my aim with my target. Here's to keeping my eyes focused on those central circles in my scope.

Ali~

What helps you stay focused on the people that matter most?